On Baby Songs

“Yum yum yum yum Yum yum yum yum Yum yum yum Yum YUM Yum yum yum……Oh, God, I think I’m singing you a cat food commercial.”

-The Missus

You’ll sing anything when you’re desperate, and as Baby G popped out the chute about three weeks before we expected her, we certainly had not honed our repertoire of lullabies. In, fact, we had zero, hence the hit “Yum, yum, Cat Food.”

Sure, there are the old standards- Twinkle, twinkle, and what have you. I’m guessing many new parents have mangled “Rock-a-Baby” in the throes of sleeplessness, and then possibly considered the lyrics for the first time. Who puts their baby up in a tree in a storm? And why does it need to end so badly? This is meant to be comforting?

Still, whatever it takes. I’ve found myself grasping for straws at all hours, which is how I wrote the surefire hit “ Straws and straws and straws and straws..” It occurs to me I should record some of these, which I plan to do when I grow an extra arm to work the recorder. When I do, we’re putting together an album called “Emergency Baby Songs.” Witness our play list already:

“It’s Crying Timeã with Daddy!”

“Farty Farty FartFartFartFart”

“These are your feet feet (all the time!)

“Scoot the Booty”


“You are wearing PANTS!”

“FartFart Re-mix: Please, God, won’t you Fart.”

“TumTumTumTum, TumTumTumTum, Foot! Foot! (This one has associated dance moves)

“There’s a Thing and some Stuff”

“Look at Those Bananas!”

…and in calmer moments

“Let’s Check Daddy’s Email!” (daytime only, recommended for 8 weeks and up)

Published in: on February 2, 2010 at 12:52 PM  Comments (3)  

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3 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. your momma farts…………you can do it,

    your daddy farts…………you should do it,

    let yourself fart, let yourself fart, let yourself fart.

  2. I looked Rock-a-bye Baby on Wikipedia and found this: “Although there is no evidence as to when the lyrics were written, it may date from the seventeenth century and have been written by an English immigrant who observed the way native-American women rocked their babies in birch-bark cradles, which were suspended from the branches of trees, allowing the wind to rock the baby to sleep.”

    That answers at least one of your questions.

  3. Now’s the time for nursery rhymes, esp. for non-singers. Rhythm and distraction will do it.

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