A matter of perspective

“Hand me a pair of her socks, will you?”, said the Missus.

“Where do we keep them?”, I asked, “Which drawer?” By ‘we’ I meant ‘her’.

“They’re not in a drawer; they’re in the wicker basket, up top”, she replied.

Baby G has her own wardrobe- and I mean that in both the fashion and the Narnian sense of the word- and I am constantly forgetting how it is organized. Every time I’m asked to change her, there will be an inevitable session of eye-rolling and sighs ten minutes later, as the Missus will come in to find that a small tornado has ripped through the room, such was my panic in trying to figure out the correct outfit to stave off hypothermia. Doesn’t Mom know that shit? I just can’t sort out the difference between sleeping sacks and onsies, fleece outer-wear and short sleeve inner-wear. As far as I’m concerned, a ‘onsie’ means ‘one’. That’s as far as I get.

Grabbing those socks, though, gave me pause. I change diapers, clothes, burp the kid, all that stuff, though not even close to the volume that the Missus does. Still, ostensibly I know how big the kid is- I even tried to file her nails once before I caught paranoia that I would saw off her first two phalanges. Picking up her socks, though, was something else. You can’t grab a pair, like a tennis ball. I pinched one pair- of which she has 18,000, all different- between my thumb and forefinger, like a wintergreen Life Saver. It looked like a colorful ball of belly-button lint. They were impossibly small in my clumsy meat-hooks.

Is she really that tiny?

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Published in: on February 4, 2010 at 7:26 PM  Comments (4)  

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4 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. yes, she is really that tiny.

  2. Reblog from Shu……

    My friend Shu (well, he’s now a Facebook friend, but once upon a time, oh God, was it really a decade ago?  we went to college together and were in-person friends), is an excellent blogger.  He creates blogs for different occasions, or parts of h…

    • What the hell is a trackback? Lost in the interflux….thanks, though Teka, sooooooo stoked about your wee one!

      • Your post made me laugh so I had to reblog. Trackbacks are the scary reminders that you live forever on the web… spoooookkkyyyy…

        By the way, sorry the blog is password protected, but it’s for the family good – we’re private people, doncha know. But feel free to register – would love to have you visit us virtually.


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